Thoughts on sleep from an adoptive Mama.

Sleep is overrated. I mean - don't get me wrong - I love sleep! I am 26 weeks pregnant and so I really really love sleep. You know who isn't such a fan? My son, Kab. He is not a fan of curling up in his bed and enjoying a good nights rest. Well not independently anyway. Tonight as we attempted for third time to get him to sleep in his crib I realized a few things. Sleep is way more fun with the people you love. And this little boy - he hasn't had that opportunity. My heart breaks into about a million pieces when he begins to cry and cling to me in my attempt to give him his freedom to sleep alone. But this "gift" that we are giving him isn't so thoughtful. He has never had the advantage of being rocked and showered with songs every night in his comfy footy pjs with a lush crib waiting for him - filled with soft blankets and his puppy blanky- then waking up to those same loving arms the next day. How dare we assume that he wants to detach from the comfort of this mamas papas arms?!!? After all - every woman and man in his life has been inconsistent and has disappeared. Gone. How do I even begin to comfort that loss? I don't even have the fortitude to comprehend what that feels like to my 16 month old son. So for now I will hold him and love him and kiss him every day until one day he isn't afraid to go to sleep, because he knows we will be there. My sweet sweet boy. If only you knew a fraction of our love for you! Someday.
Until then - sleep is overrated - unless you are with the ones you love...